My Favorite Ex

Oh sunshine, sweet one, memorable child

I shouldn’t be thinking of you

For there were so many wrongs done, gallons filled with tears, shattered hearts, strained voices, and everlasting scars

You were a loss

Still can’t figure out whether it was a good or bad

But a loss is a loss

And this loss was heavy

Till this day I remember how shy and scared we were

But the connection was immediate; there was no denying it

I clinged on to you

Knowing deep down that

Our souls spoke in a language we didn’t know

It all moved so quickly and perhaps that was the mistake

Before I knew it

We were sharing intimate moments, secrets, and stories

You were so sweet but you were so broken

I was broken too but I wanted to fix you

You were an innocent love that I wanted to protect

The tears you shed and the battles you fought

Tore my heart apart

But I admired your strength and ability to spread positivity

Night after night I spoke empty words

To try and console you

What we shared was pain

Pain has a way of attaching people together in a way love can’t

But I was no good and no help at all

I loved you before I knew how to love at all

My foreign love only caused more pain

Hurting you was not ok

I was not ok

So we both began a war we could not stop

Your tears fell on me like pieces of glass

My lack of expression opened wounds that left marks

Now here we are a few years later

With our bodies always reminding us

Of hardships and failures

Our friendship being one of them

I know it’s too late to fix

What has been shattered and thrown away

But I am truly sorry

The words, “I love you” I could not say